Kyle writes tell all autobiography

Guest Blogger Melanie McCartney, Director of Cartwheel Printing Solutions, gives us her opinion on Kyle's news that he is writing a tell all autobiography.

So Kyle Sandilands is writing a ‘tell all’ autobiography of his life over the last few years, well he won’t be penning it of course, that’s what ghost writers are for! And don’t let the fact that he hasn’t ‘read a book since year 8’ get in the way of his lack of literary skills.  

He has been gearing up for this for some time with wild statements and innuendo that he has ‘pay dirt’ so to speak on his employers at Southern Cross.  

“At the end of the day, I know about everyone’s skeletons. I know who’s fucking who and, for some weird reason, I’ve become the keeper of the industry’s filthy secrets. So when things in the media get really out of control, that’s when I make a call and say, “Look, unless you want me to go and tell everyone this or that, you’d better shut your fuckin’ mouth. You’ve had your fun but it’s over now.” That’s when they shit themselves.” - Kyle Sandilands in Maxim magazine.

 

May as well go out swinging, well if you are Kyle anyway. It would seem that the ship is going down and he may as well sell out as much possible before it goes belly up. The first thing that I thought of was of those gag books (or ‘toilet books’) that you buy for your colleagues as part of Kris Kringle at Christmas. My partner was given one last year. It’s called ‘Things bogans like’ and Kyle Sandilands gets plenty of mentions.  

Perhaps that is the vein in which he should set his hefty tome of the ‘last few years of his life’ autobiography. Oh hang on an autobiography is a book about the life of that person written by that person. So how does that work then?  

Never mind I’m sure the literary world will be as set on fire as they were when Naomi Campbell’s esteemed ghost written ‘Swan’ came out in 1994. Another pampered individual with anger issues but I digress.    

In other good news the petition is sitting at 34,346 so not far away from the target of 35,000 at all! And the Sponsor list is at 99, it goes up and down but we average at least one with drawl per day.  

The times are a changing and as time ticks on and a handful of sponsors have gone back to show. Which is to be expected in business and we were prepared for that but what I don’t think Southern Cross stereo counted on was everyone’s sheer commitment to see this through. People from all walks of life, backgrounds and continents work tirelessly to do their part in whichever way that they can. Some might get busy with other commitments but come back when they can to help out.  

Pet Kyle peeve of the week – His over use of ‘doing’ someone as his gauge for everything in life! Would you ‘do her’? Would you ‘do him’? Are hardly interview questions to the ‘Stars’ are they? And his pick for the female gold logies winner this year? Esther Anderson – Why you ask? Because he would ‘sleep with her’ aka ‘do her’!  

Heavens help the poor ghostwriter that gets to interpret his potty-mouthed vernacular. Whatever you do though don’t give him bad press over his first foray into ‘writing’ or he might ‘hunt you down’...    

Until next time, if you haven’t signed the petition yet please do so at –   http://www.change.org/petitions/2day-and-fox-fm-sponsors-cancel-advertising-until-kyle-sandilands-is-dumped-from-radio-vilekyle  

You can follow us on Twitter @sackvilekylefb – https://twitter.com/#!/sackvilekylefb or help us to contact sponsors by asking nicely for a minute of their time and putting your case forward via phone, email, Twitter, Facebook and even snail mail if you like! The important thing is that we are not rude or abusive, you will win some and lose some but you will probably be pleasantly surprised.

Warm regards

Melanie

Cartwheel Printing Solutions can be found here www.cartwheelprintingsolutions.com and here https://twitter.com/#!/CartwheelPrint